The power of story, and an intervention by angels…

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Cadillac Ranch. A cool roadside attraction on our trip west.

Within the first couple hours of our road trip to Colorado earlier this month, we lost a wallet.  Not fun, right?  Here’s what happened.  We stopped at a convenience store just over an hour away from home to grab some soda and juice.  My sweetheart started to give me his wallet to pay, and I said, no – it’s ok – I have mine.

We kept driving.  To Alexandria, Louisiana.  Now about four and a half hours from home.  And we got to the hotel, and my sweetheart said, “Honey, what did you do with my wallet?”  Oh.  No.  My stomach dropped.  Had he handed me his wallet while he went to the bathroom?  What did I do with it?  Did I leave it on the counter? We searched high and low.  In every possible nook and cranny in the car.  We didn’t find it.  It was 10 p.m.

Ok, so I asked myself, what’s perfect about this?  (Very hard in a situation like this, believe me.)  I always start with, “We’re ok.”  Then, “There wasn’t that much money in it.”, Then, “Only one credit card to cancel.”  We got on the phone and took care of that.

Then there was the matter of the driver’s license.  And here the angels intervened.  1. We were still in Louisiana.  2.  We had internet and a laptop to easily search for Motor Vehicle offices.  3.  The office in Alexandria was literally less than a five-minute drive from our hotel! Can’t you hear the angelic choirs singing??

We went there the next day, first thing.  And there wasn’t much of a wait.  (Go, angels!) And they renewed my sweetheart’s license so he won’t have to wait in line in a couple of months in New Orleans.  And then it was done and we were on our way.

“Ok”, you say.  “I get it. Angels intervened. But what about the power of story? Why is that in the title?”  Well, a couple of reasons.  We could have used a lot of energy telling a really different story about this.  About how awful it was.  About how we couldn’t believe that no one had turned in the wallet (we did call the convenience store – amazing that we were able to remember which one and find its number online!) About all the money we’d lost.  About the hassle of changing online accounts to new credit card numbers.  About how stupid I was for leaving the wallet on the counter, or wherever I’d left it.  We could have seen it as a “bad omen” for our whole trip.

But we didn’t.  We had a fantastic trip.  We didn’t even think about it much except that my sweetie had to ask me for my credit card when we’d stop for gas.

And then we came home.  And you will never guess what was on my sweetheart’s desk. Did you guess? You’re right! His wallet.  Because he’d never brought it in the first place. He’d only offered to pay.  He had never actually handed me his wallet!  We’d completely fabricated that part of the story!

And here’s where the angels actually intervened.  What if we had realized we didn’t have the wallet at the convenience store- one hour away from home?  We would have probably driven back to get it, which would have taken more than twice as long as what we ended up doing.  And it would have been a very un-fun two hours.  In traffic.

I make up stories all the time – I create motives, fabricate background information, and selectively remember facts.  And I just finished a book, a rather dark book, but an incredible story that illustrates this so well.  It’s called The Sense of An Ending, by Julian Barnes.  It’s a short, engaging novel that so clearly illustrates the power of story to affect real lives.  You’ll think you know what’s happening right up until the end – I won’t spoil it.

So, what stories are you telling yourself these days about the circumstances around you?  Do you have a good example of how you turned around what seemed like crummy circumstances into a better story?  Are you noticing the intervention of angels/the universe/luck, or whatever you want to call it, in your life?  I’d love to hear!  Email me at carla@livingwildandprecious.com or share your story in the comments below.

Worshiping at the altar of busy

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It’s funny, I was talking to a good friend about my crusade against the word “crazy-busy” and this idea of everyone telling everyone else how busy they are all the time, like it’s a badge of honor.

And surprisingly, she said, “Do you know how embarrassing it is not to be busy?  What are you supposed to tell people?”

Oh. Right.  That’s how we show that all is well in our culture.  A packed calendar, a list of accomplishments – a whole lot of doing, doing, doing.  We’re fine – we’re  just so busy!

Me – I’m starting to rebel against this kind of thinking. For the past bunch of years, I’ve been slowly chipping away at this concept. Now when people ask, “How are you?  Really busy?”  I’ve stopped saying, “Oh, yeah. Things are just so busy.” Because I really don’t want to live that way anymore.

Sure, sometimes I’m still busy, and sometimes my days are super-full.  But I’m not all proud of it anymore.  In fact, when my calendar gets too stuffed, I get honest with myself about what’s going on that’s led me to pile up so many appointments or commitments.  I get really curious.  Especially if I’m saying yes to everyone but myself.

I know what you might be thinking – that you don’t have any choice.  That there’s absolutely nothing you can do to escape the modern scourge of busyness.  Or that if you do elect to be less busy, that you’ll be excluded, ostracized, shunned. And God forbid you don’t sign your kids up for every available sport, activity, party, etc. Really – if we weren’t busy with all of this stuff, what would we post on Facebook?  Pictures of us finally getting enough sleep???

If you are craving a weekend of less busy and more you, with time to think and reflect and perhaps create a new reality for yourself by figuring out how to say yes to what you really want and no to what you don’t,  consider joining me for my Clarity and Connections retreat in beautiful St. Francisville, LA, July 27-29.  A small group of women gaining clarity about what we really want and connecting with nature, ourselves and each other.  With waterfalls included!  Check out the details here.

I’ve designed it for me – what I mean is that it’s exactly what I want when I’m craving  a weekend to press my own internal reset button.  There will be plenty of Wordlessness à la Martha Beck, plus free time to lounge and reflect, along with some powerful tools that will give you major clarity, fast, even if like me, you’re already sold on the idea of backing off on busy.

$99 reserves your spot, and there’s still time to get the early bird rate! Click here to go to the information page.

And I’d love to hear your thoughts about busyness.  How are you dealing with it in your daily life?

Buster wisdom: Sitting in the grass and the power of *and*

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My head is positively swirling with ideas, to-dos, tasks, brainstorms – you name it.  And I am tired.  I just returned from an incredible coaching mastery retreat where I was supported, inspired, and filled up.  And now there’s so much to do!  And I want to wave my wand and have it all done now. The actual doing is a different story, as I suddenly feel the overwhelming urge to nap…

I spent the early morning today at the collision center dropping off my car and picking up a rental.  You may recall, when I was all zen about not worrying, that our car died.  And we bought a new one.  Not only new, but from the future!  A 2013!  And then a distracted driver backed into it while it was parked in front of our house last week.  This was not part of the plan.

So my wand waving waited. On the way home from the collision center, I stopped at the farmers’ market and bought peaches, blueberries, strawberries, tomatoes, broccoli, squash, eggs and more.  I filled my bags with healthy local food.  My computer and my wand waving waited a little longer.

As I opened the gate I saw my best wisdom teacher, Buster, resting in the shady front yard.  I unpacked the food, then stepped barefoot into the lovely grass and joined him.  And breathed.  Because if I don’t have time, on a beautiful sunny day, to sit in the grass for a few minutes, then something is really off.

This week I’m going to believe in the word “and”.  I can work toward my goals *and* sit in the grass for a few minutes.  I can complete tasks *and* cut up strawberries.  I can drive to unexpected places like collision centers *and* enjoy the trip, rocking out to the 80’s on satellite radio.  I can write *and* I can nap.  I can create *and* I can breathe.  Wow.  Buster knows.  We are so lucky.

What are some of your *and* statements for the week?